Viking Jenn

Park Princess Playdate

2011-12-07T11:16:00.001-08:00

At long last, "Park Princess Playdate" is done! I started this painting about 8 months ago. It's 30"x40" so it's a big one. Cloaked in princess imagery, the OC is ripe for the ribbing in this painting. I created this painting in response to being a mom in the OC, the many different types of moms I encounter and my feelings about being a part of a town that boggles my mind. From left to right, here's a who who in case you don't recognize them: Cinderella, Snow White, Aurora (Sleeping Beauty), Belle (Beauty and the Beast) and Ariel (The Little Mermaid). This painting has layers of symbolism for me. In the background is all their castles, see if you can recognize which one belongs to which princess! Notice the children and how they are different from normal kids. Notice Ariel's fish children. Hmmmm....even her little one is a fish in a bowl. And notice how they are not meeting each other's eyes, they exist separately here at the park, all wrapped up in their own little world. When I first moved here, this is how I felt, like Snow White just coming onto the scene. What to make of all of it? I was filled with mixed emotions for sure. Anger, sadness, alienation...who was I now? And any new mom could probably relate. Years later, I now understand each "princesses" plight a little more and their lives beyond the surface. Plumb below the surface and I have found out they each struggle with something different. I have grown to have more compassion for them.

I am now working on portraits of each of the princesses, each containing in essence their true self beyond the park facade or what they might be struggling with on a personal level. I'd love to hear what you think of this painting and what you "get" from it!

Going to Rehab

2011-09-20T10:44:00.000-07:00

Amy Going to Rehab
Pencil on Bristol Board
11 x 14

Portrait of Amy Winehouse

2011-09-14T11:19:00.000-07:00

I've been very interested lately in the music and life of Amy Winehouse. Such an amazing talent, huge voice and a death that came way too early. She truly lived her life "out loud," if you have not heard the album "Back to Black" it is a must. It will move you. Upon doing some research, I learned she suffered from bipolar disorder as so many creative individuals do. It's as if the fire that burns inside us just about eclipses up in our fits of emotions, addictions and moods.

RIP Amy, your music will live on in our hearts.

Brush Your Teeth!

2011-09-06T11:05:00.001-07:00

A smoosh for my son's bathroom! The plan is to paint this by his sink...when he goes back to school that is. He starts on Monday...phew! I am needing some alone time badly. I'm going stir crazy...and it is blasted hot this week. This viking girl prefers the cold! Bring on the rain already, bring on the dark of fall, I'm ready for it.

Some random things...

Books I'm reading:
1. Making a Living Without a Job by Barbara Winter
2. Refining Your Life: From the Zen Kitchen to Enlightenment by Dogen and Uchiyama
3. The Happiness Advantage: The Seven Principles of Positive Psychology That Fuels Success and Performance at Work (given to me by my Dad the businessman) by Shawn Achor

This Fall, my baby will be going to Jr. Kindergarten and turning 5 in November. The school age years are upon me and some shifting will be occurring once again. New teacher, new friends and new moms. I've got my positive hat on, doing a lot of positive self talk and gearing up for a fun year ahead as he embarks on the journey of reading, manners and citizenship...staying steady in my practice (putting zazen on the calendar has been very motivational), and doing more wall accents in our house to build my portfolio.

Plus I need a new tattoo! I gotta shake things up around here in Newport Beach. This place needs to be shaken!

Mermaid Musings

2011-07-26T11:57:00.001-07:00

Mermaids, cupcakes, hearts! Up on a wall in a girl's room! Doesn't every little girl love mermaids? I know I sure do.

Busy working on designs for my muraling/wall art business. The watercolor incorporates my smoosh designs with a banner for a name. Imagine that over a bed! How cool would that be?

Wanna have one of my designs in your house? I'm ready for hire, ready to splash a bunch of color onto your walls and liven up your house!

Contact me at vikingknitter@yahoo.com

A card for Lily

2011-07-11T12:51:00.001-07:00

This is a card that I created for my friend Joan's baby-to-be, Miss Lily! Joan is my best friend from college, our alma mater, UCLA. Go Bruins! I've been thinking and reminiscing a lot about those good old days from the Arts floor in Sproul Hall. 4North! (I wonder if 4North is still the arts floor?) We were a wild bunch. Artists, musicians, actors all on one floor sharing rooms and streaking down corridors. Those were some of the best times of my life.

Go Ask Alice Smoosh

2011-07-07T13:59:00.001-07:00

A few months ago, I saw the movie Suckerpunch and although I thought it to be quite misogynistic, the look and sound of the film captivated me. The whole aesthetic of the film was just to my liking. I bought the soundtrack from iTunes and listen to it like crack cocaine. The darker notes of the song "White Rabbit" by Emiliana Torrini really hit the sweet spot (original by Jefferson Airplane, "Go Ask Alice"). I was thinking of drawing a smoosh with chocolate cake and suddenly while sitting on the couch with my honey it came to me...chocolate cake, lipstick, razer blades...and Alice. The song resonating in my head...

One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all

Go ask Alice
When she's ten feet tall
And if you go chasing rabbits
And you know you're going to fall

Tell them a hookah-Smoking caterpillar
Has given you the call
Call Alice when she was just small
When the men on the chess board get up and tell you where to go

And you just had some kind of mushroom
And your mind is moving slow
Go ask Alice
I think she'll know
When logic and proportion
Have fallen SLOPPY dead
And the white knight is talking backwards
And the Red Queen's LOST her head
Remember what the dormouse said

Feed your head
Feed your head

Pirate Smoosh

2011-06-30T12:53:00.001-07:00

A Pirate smoosh for my lil pirate man Heath. Oh how I love him so. I'd like to paint a banner above his bed with his name in it with accompanying pirate symbols.

This week has been the start of many new adventures for him and for us as parents. He started a foreign language camp called Lango held at Irvine Valley College. He will be immersed in Spanish for 7 weeks, enough time for his brain to "acquire" the language. He's doing well except for a little anxiety this morning, both on his and my part (day 4 of the camp, this is normal I hear for this age to adjust to a new situation). Mommy has anxiety so this is something I am constantly dealing with in myself too. I am proud of his bravery and that we are teaching him the appropriate coping skills when dealing with feelings. We want to raise an emotionally intelligent child.

Whenever we have change happening in our lives, it is normal to have feelings of anxiety. I have learned that with anxiety, thoughts come up, they produce a certain feeling/emotion, which then creates body sensations. Body sensations determine behavior. If I can ride the wave of anxiety and let it peak, eventually the anxiety will go down. The experts say it takes about 20 minutes for feelings of anxiety to subside. I did that today and by golly, the anxiety did go down on it's own. If I didn't have my zen practice, I don't know where I'd be...

Bear Smoosh

2011-06-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

My smoosh idea is going further...now it's bears, skulls and roses. It uses the design principle of repetition which I think works really well. This one I just used some colored pencil to quickly see how color works within the design. I'm working on a pirate smoosh right now...

Smoosh it baby!

Unicorn Loveliness...and Emotions

2011-06-08T11:24:00.000-07:00

Here's my lovely unicorn painting, based on Princess Celestia, which I own. Would you believe that my son gave me a My Little Pony for my birthday? She has wings, a crown, pretty turquoise and purple hair and when you push her button, she says nice things like, "Let's fly to the castle!", "Spectacular!", "My barrettes look so pretty!", "I love to make new friends!", and my favorite, "I'm a princess, are you a princess too?" And her wings light up! She's awesome. She's like a totem to remind myself to stay positive.

Speaking of staying positive, I've come to a greater realization about my emotions. I've been having some strong angry feelings of late because of an end-of-the-year pizza party at preschool and my son's level 5 dairy allergy. It stirs up feelings from last year, it makes me anxious, it makes me feel wronged, I could go on and on. However, I realize that it's okay to let myself have these emotions. It's when I start to say, "I shouldn't feel this way!" "This is bad!", that this judgment of my feelings makes me feel worse. In Zen, there is a saying, "When it is hot, the heat kills the monk." When it is hot, be hot. Feel that thing completely. When I am angry, I just feel angry. When you are sad, be sad. It might take me awhile or a walk in the back bay to cool down, but this is the way of the Tao. The resistance to our human nature causes us suffering. I suffer more when I resist what is. And since there is always impermanence, our feelings and their energy will change over time. I just took an hour walk in the Back Bay and already, I am feeling better and a little lighter.

I will share a verse from "The Dragon Who Never Sleeps" by Robert Aitken Roshi

When anger or sadness arises
I vow with all beings
to accept my emotional nature-
it's how I embody the Tao.

I get in the most trouble when I say to myself that I shouldn't feel a certain way or have a certain emotion. If I just let myself feel it, I can move on more easily.

Cupcake Smoosh

2011-06-02T15:21:00.000-07:00

Cupcakes, roses and unicorn horns smoosh! I call this a royal smoosh. Smooshed cause I like these things. Smoosh it all together and it's even better. A huge smoosh of goodness and sweetness. Part tattoo design, part I'm not sure what, but it makes me smile. I see this muraled big on my bathroom door.

I'm playing around with this in photoshop to colorize it, but staring at the screen is giving me eye strain.

Tomorrow my honey and I celebrate our 11th wedding anniversary. (Wow!) We're gonna have a taste of Japan at the Miyako Hotel in Torrance. Spa, food, rest and celebrating our lives together. I can't wait to lie on the hot rocks of the ganban-yoku with my man. I am so thankful that we are sharing this life together, thankful for such a wonderful husband and father to our child. Smoosh it all together, it's pretty wonderful.

Unicorns and more Unicorns

2011-05-23T16:26:00.001-07:00

More unicorns! What's a girl to do? Admit obsession with unicorns at the moment. Draw, draw, draw. I see these in little girls' rooms, splashed on the walls with bright colors. Future business in the works...

Fantasy Girl World

2011-05-15T20:33:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I like to picture myself in a fantasy world full of girlie things. Full of pinkness, rainbows, My Little Pony, Totoros, lollipops and cupcake trees. Fun to draw, fun to paint. Random silliness...

Poppies

2011-05-09T14:20:00.000-07:00

For Mother's Day, I made some handpainted cards for my Mom and Mother-In-Law. This is the one I made for my Mom, my one and only. We had a wonderful time celebrating the day at our house. John took care of all the cooking and I got to relax and take it all in...

Totoro

2011-04-29T11:12:00.000-07:00

This is Totoro! A wonderful creature from the film, "My Neighbor Totoro" by Hiyao Miyazaki. Whenever I see Totoro it makes me smile. John and I had "Draw Totoro Day" at our house a few days ago. We like to have little drawing contests. It stimulates our creativity and is generally a lot of fun. Even Heath drew one too! There's also another little famous creature in there too, if you know the game I'm referring to!

I've really been turning inwards lately and with my whole heart, truly embracing myself. Embracing the searching and questioning mind that I have. Embracing the changing tides of my moods. Embracing who makes me, me. Essentially the question that keeps going round and round lately is, what is my higher purpose? What is the purpose of my life? I realize now that this life, the only one I have, is my one true path. The problems or circumstances that I find myself in are there to teach me, to make me wake up. Right now, I am using my art for the healing process and perhaps I am here on this earth to help others who may struggle with their inner emotional life. You are not alone out there. There is hope, there is light, there is the depth of our feelings and there are spiritual teachers all around us. You alone are your greatest spiritual teacher. I want to be a beacon of hope if there ever was one, because I have been to the depths of the bottom of my spirit and to the tops of relief, spaciousness and expansiveness. And back and again, over and over again. This is a cycle I need to embrace.

Be a beacon unto yourself. That is one of the great teachings that I keep coming back to. Do what makes you happy, be silly, wonder in the vastness of it all. When I want to be silly, I look at this little guy Totoro and he makes me smile.

Snow White goes to the Park

2011-04-20T13:54:00.000-07:00

I'm working on a new canvas and idea right now that I am so excited about. Park commentary on living here in Newport Beach and part autobiographical, this painting will combine all the things I love about the Disney princesses, but with a modern twist. Here is a sketch of my favorite princess, Snow White, as a new mom. What ever happened to the princesses when they got married and became mommies? What archetypes would they fulfill in their new role? What about living here in the "Gilded Ghetto?" How do I feel being a mom in this area? At times, I feel like I'm just one of the gang, but at other times, I feel like I don't fit in, the renegade pink-hair dyed mommy with tattoos and just one child.

Without giving too much away, this painting is going to say a lot. It's going to be pointed, it's going to be funny and it's going to be Low Brow (my favorite genre of painting).

The canvas is 30" x 40." I'm working from the background forward, so right now the sky is in, some clouds and I'm working on a row of castles. One for each princess in the painting.

Guess who Snow White is representing?

Spring Sesshin

2011-03-23T11:00:00.000-07:00

"March comes in like a lion and out like a lamb." This was the theme of our sesshin two weeks ago at ZCOC.. Two days later I did this painting inspired by this phrase and sitting for hours on end. Sitting for me is like peeling the layers of an onion. The first day was peeling the outer layer, the tough, anxious side. The side that does not want to yield under pressure. The side that is like a mask, even to me. As time progressed, I felt like more layers were being peeled off till I got to the softer denser center where my fears lie. The part of the onion which is hidden from the outside. I roared like a lion as I felt that fear bubble up in me. My anxieties laid bare in front of me. I sat with it, letting myself feel the sensations, hearing the thoughts, seeing it for what it is. Crying, because the pain was so intense, just like the fumes from an onion brings tears to those cutting it. And seeing the sensations die down in the wake of silence. Off the cushion, these thoughts come back, repeatedly and sometimes I wonder if my practice is really working. But I guess I feel some amount of distance and spaciousness around them. Maybe a little. It's that sense of impermanence that makes me feel like I can get through any storm in my mind, however severe it is. It will pass, it will. And if not, I can just be aware of it and let it just be.

Flowers at Disneyland

2011-03-09T18:39:00.000-08:00

I have this new thing I do when I go to Disneyland now. If you are a annual passholder (like me), check out the variety of seasonal flowers every time you go. I swear, they change the flower beds on a monthly basis! Think of those gardeners, working at night so that the park looks extra special in the morning. I used to work there in my college days, so I know the attention to detail is very high. A few weeks ago, the tulips were all in bloom, all at the same time too. Of particular note were the ornamental cabbages by Fairy Hollow and the hanging baskets by the statue of Walt and Mickey. So now I take pictures of the array of flowers I see each time I go and it's a joy to do.

Enjoy Yourself

2011-03-04T11:22:00.001-08:00

A few weeks ago, McDonald's was giving away My Little Pony's as part of their Happy Meal. Just like little kids do, I said to myself, I want one! I was able to get three different ones with all different names, Applejack, Princess Celestia and one other I can't remember. But their candy colored tails brought a smile to my face and reminded myself to lighten up and have fun. Enjoy myself! What a concept! Then I started obsessing over pink hair and maybe I should buy a pink wig, but that obsession was quickly squashed by my husband who said, you really wouldn't wear it out in public now would you? Oops, he was right. Instead, I bought something else instead and that will be coming in the mail soon. So remember to enjoy yourself this Friday my friends. Goof off and remember to smile at the silly stuff!

Two rock doves

2011-02-22T15:40:00.000-08:00

Two rock doves sitting on the telephone wire behind our house. A pink Maxfield parrish sky from a different day. A quick impression on a piece of 3x5 watercolor paper.

What is it about birds and me? It is a reoccurant theme in my work. Flight, escape, peace, simplicity. There's got to be a deep psychological meaning. The red headed sparrows are returning to our garden as Spring comes closer. Heath runs around naked outside and I enjoy the feel of the warm sun on my neck.

We only have moments to live.-John Kabat Zinn

A Tree and a Crow

2011-02-11T11:54:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, I saw this outside my kitchen window. There is an enormous tree on the street behind us and I love to watch it change throughout the seasons. Right now of course, it's barren and as I was chopping vegetables I looked up, and high above in the branches sat one little crow. Perched at the uppermost branch looking out. If I had not been practicing awareness, I might have missed this one single moment.

So I made this quick little study of my impression of that moment, a small 3x5 painting like the affirmations I've been creating. I like this small format. I can make a small painting, like a sketch and capture something fleeting. And I don't have to commit myself to an entire canvas.

In fact, I've got to go make a Valentine's Day card for my man and I will be making it a 3x5 painting as well!

A Saturday Affirmation

2011-02-05T15:54:00.001-08:00

Repeat after me,

"I am complete."

You are a diamond. You are a beautiful gem. You are complete and you know this in your inner being. Sit and be still. You are now polishing the diamond.

A Monday Affirmation

2011-01-31T11:32:00.000-08:00

"I embrace all sides of me."

Goof off day at the Happiest Place on Earth

2011-01-28T09:29:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, we had the most awesome day at Disneyland, the Happiest Place on Earth. It really is for me. Maybe it's all the good memories I have of this place as a child, or my love for the Disney movies like Snow White and Cinderella. But when I walk down Main Street, I really do feel transported into a different space, far removed from the outside world. I have great respect for Walt Disney and what he did for animation and artists of that day. And I love the frozen bananas!

So now that I'm sporting my new Snow White tattoo on my forearm, my husband John took a day off of work and we ventured across the "berm" and into the place where you can "leave the world behind." (We also have annual passes of course, so these become like a monthly pilgrimage.) One of my goals was to get a picture with Snow White and ride the Snow White ride. And to do some serious goofing off. Goofing off to me sometimes means wearing crazy outfits to the park, so I sported my OC Roller Girls t-shirt layered over a polka dot tank, with denim shorts and black and grey knee highs with my John Fluevog boots. Oh it feels good to goof off! Okay, so off we go towards the wishing well and lo and behold, it's my Snow White! But dammit, I pull out my camera and the battery is dead. But I do go see her and she is such the perfect Snow! I show her my tattoo and she says in her high voice, "Oh my, it's lovely. Is it permanent?" Oh yes, it is! Heath acts all bashful and she says she knows someone named "Bashful" too. I tell her I will come back later with a "new" camera, of which I spend $20 for a disposable one. And as I leave her, I have tears in my eyes. For reasons that are hard to explain, Snow White gives me a lot of psychological comfort!

It was such a light day at the park, with wait times of 10 mins or so for everything. January and February are excellent times to go. Many, many rides later with multiple trips on Thunder Mountain, Space Mountain and the Haunted Mansion, I return the well with camera in hand. She came back and she's with the Evil Queen! Ooh, this will be interesting! It was awesome, here is the conversation:

Snow: "Ooh, she came back! See (to the Queen), she has me on her arm!"

Evil Queen very dramatically: "Oh, but what is MY mirror doing there? Didn't you get the memo?"

Me: "Because SHE is the fairest one of all!" Queen scoffs and acts all put out. (hahahaha!)

I felt so good saying that, because she is, Snow trumps the queen! It was such a great moment. And I got my pictures which made me quite happy. But I've got to go get them developed, so no instant downloadable gratification today.

Goof off day was awesome. What does goof off time look like to you?

(Tattoo by Eric Jones at Gold Rush Tattoo in Costa Mesa.)

Affirmations

2011-01-24T21:03:00.000-08:00

In this journey of self-acceptance, a certain someone in my life recommended that I start working with affirmations. I didn't realize how damn critical I was of myself until I started meditating and really observed my thoughts and then applied this practice in my daily life. That self critical voice is very strong and I realized I needed to do something about it. I'm here observing all these negative voices, but then what? Why is it still there after a year and a half of meditating? You know what, it's called conditioning! All that stuff in my past, influencing the person that I am today. I had an "Aha" moment! Yes, I understand now! It may seem obvious, but when you are in the thick of it, you can't see the forest through the trees. I am learning that I can deprogram myself. But this is hard work I tell you. I must say too that now that I'm understanding where all this conditioning is coming from, my meditation practice is working much better.

So remember that annoying character from Saturday Night Life, Stuart Smalley? He would stand in front of the mirror and say "I'm good enough; I'm smart enough; and gosh darn it people like me." These are affirmations, positive statements aimed at changing negative thought patterns and building self-esteem. This certain someone in my life, I'll call her my mentor, said I needed to make affirmation cards specifically for me. Whenever I find myself in the "pit of despair" or in the midst of an anxiety attack or having my triggers pushed, I should turn to these cards for consolation and to stop the negative thought train. Read them, repeat them to myself, look at the picture. They should have a strong "I am..." voice, a very strong positive affirming statement about myself. If I feel at times that I am not a good mother (for example), then a card should say, "I am a loving, nurturing mother." They are a reprogramming tool. This is different from Zen practice, where we observe our thoughts and feelings and then return to the present moment. In Zen practice, we aren't trying to change the thoughts, but be more aware of them. Well, I'm sure as heck aware of them, and they need to stop derailing me.

I started making these cards and they sure are fun to make! It's been such a pleasure in itself! They are each 3 x 5 watercolor paintings with the affirmation in calligraphy on the back. Three of them are above.

From left to right here is what they say on the back:

I am a beautiful person.

I can observe my thoughts and feelings. (For experiencing difficult emotions and remembering my Zen practice)

I can handle my day. (Featuring Totoro! He makes me smile.)

Now the test is to use them and see if they help and make a difference. I will have more cards done and I will be presenting more here on my blog. What do you think of affirmations? I'd love to hear your feedback.

A New Year, a New Medium

2011-01-12T10:56:00.000-08:00

The start of 2011 means the end of my painting project goal for 2010 which originally was to paint one painting a month for a year. It was a big goal, a lofty one at that because I quickly learned that admist taking caring of my 4 year old son, managing the house, cooking, cleaning, playdates, Zen practice, MOMS Club and all the daily life stuff, this goal was stretching me a bit. But it made me put into question, why do I push myself so much? Where is this pressure that I put myself under coming from? It made me question, a lot. I am learning it all stems from somewhere...childhood. Where else do we learn how to be, but from our parents and how we were raised. So now I am on the journey of self-acceptance, but I digress...

Back to the painting project. In the end, I finished 7 paintings and did a number of watercolors, drawings and sketches. I think I will call it a success! Even though I did not make the initial goal of 12 paintings, I feel I really did something special in those 7 paintings. Moments in time were captured, almost like a visual journal of sorts. The last painting (above), "Red Riding Hood's Revenge" captured a period when John was listening to the 999 and Heath would sing along with their song, "Little Red Riding Hood." We were all a little "LRRH" obsessed for a time. I got a red coat inspired by her, John got two new tattoos (a wolf and LRRH) and it spurred on a competition between the two of us to see who could paint or draw a better LRRH. We posted our works on Facebook and had our friends vote. I was the winner!

As the year turned after the solstice, I found myself drawn back into watercolors. So fluid, so ephemeral, so quick they can be. My friend Tad at ZCOC is a writer and poet and after telling me about the haikus that he had written, I expressed interest in doing some illustrations for him. Below is a painting I did based on one of his haikus...

Light through the trees
branches and leaves form a lantern
-the full moon! the moon!

-Tad Sullivan

Inner Demons

2010-12-04T16:28:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I feel like this inside and the only way to make it stop is to draw. Curse you demons!

Lean on a Tree (Yosemite 2010)

2010-11-13T21:16:00.000-08:00

This past week we were up in one of the most beautiful places in California...Yosemite. I was more than ready to let go of my stress and anxiety that had built up over the past few months and let the nature and trees absorb my worries and cares. This was probably my first vacation where I didn't do anything except what was right in front of me. I didn't try to distract myself with reading, listening to music, watching tv or knitting (except I did do a little of this when I came down with a cold). Just being, just being present with the beauty and all the quiet. Everything perfect just the way it was. Not wanting to add anything to the moments of being up in Yosemite Valley. Why do we all feel the need to add more on top of our experiences when just living our ordinary lives is more than enough? Sitting this past sesshin (at ZCOC) brought this to light.

So in the midst of my son getting a timeout in our cabin (with Daddy enforcing it), I had to remove myself from the situation so that I could cool down and he could do his timeout...what did I do? I took a quick walk out to the huge trees and leaned on one. I let the tree absorb my anger and frustration. I felt it's solidity and rootedness. I breathed and calmed down. Call me a tree hugger! Yes, I am a wanna be crunchy-granola type that lives in Newport Beach. But try it, lean on a tree when you need it, it may surprise you.

This was really our first big vacation since Heath was born four years ago. I learned how important vacations are, especially now that I am a parent and the demands of being one can overwhelm and take it's toll mentally and physically. And since this one had followed closely on the heals of my 3 day sesshin (a meditation marathon of sorts at a Zen center), I saw the cumulative effects of being quiet, just observing, listening to what each moment required of me and not wanting anything more than that.

Because when you are nearly a 4 year old, warming your backside by the fire is enough in itself.

Sesshin

2010-10-29T11:26:00.000-07:00

The wind blows hard among the pines
Toward the beginning
Of an endless past.
Listen: you've heard everything.
- Shinkichi Takahashi

Stitch 'N Witch

2010-10-19T11:39:00.000-07:00

A play on the words, Stitch 'N Bitch, after the knitting group I founded. But perfect for Halloween!

"Release"

2010-10-15T11:26:00.000-07:00

Painting #6.

This painting was started on the Equinox. A very personal snapshot of what was happening at the time...I don't want to say much to spoil the feeling.

Equinox Approaching

2010-09-10T21:57:00.000-07:00

Only 11 more days till we reach the Equinox. Which means I made it through the summer! When summer was upon us and there was no more preschool, I was a bit panicked…what was I going to do with Heath all day? What would I do without my regularly scheduled breaks? Was I gonna go bonkers? I nearly went bonkers towards the end, but we had Papa Walt’s pool, playdates with friends, gymnastics class (during which I read “The Help”), parties, the OC Fair and Heath’s obsession with basketball. I wanted to not overschedule our summer. Everyone kept asking me, so what are your plans during the summer? I was asked this so much that soon I was doubting my own ability to parent. Drove me bats. Do we really need to overschedule our children? Do we need to constantly need to have “something” for them to do? What about just “being?” Have you ever just sat and just practiced “being?” Trees know a lot about this. Look at that tree outside your window, it knows a lot about “being.”

I find it very calming when the seasons change. I do my own “turning of the wheel” rituals when the Equinoxes and Solstices come around. On September 21, I will bring out my fall decorations and decorate above the hearth, light a candle and perhaps smudge the house this year. (Remnants of my former Heathen days.) I love sensing the change happening in the air and I am reminded of impermanence. This rate of change though, sometimes makes me wistful as I see a season ending and see my boy growing and changing. I tend to get pretty reflective!

I think I’m reaching my own Equinox with this one coming up. I’m hopeful that I will reach some sort of equilibrium. And now I just got inspired for painting #6…

The Diamond Way

2010-08-28T19:46:00.000-07:00

I surprised myself. I didn't think I'd be able to get a painting done this summer, what with all the summer activities and keeping my "Hurricane Heath" just busy enough but not too overstimulated. But as Heath played on the computer, I whipped out my brushes and went into action mode. And what do ya know, I got it done! It's all about taking action!!

I approached this painting with a much different approach than normal. I just stared painting and let the painting unfold over the course of the month, adding elements as the painting sort of spoke to me. I know, this is a weird painting! It's full of random associations, and some Zen stuff too. But it is an expression of this time period and I am pleased with its quirkiness. I will say one thing and that is I got way into polka dots the last time I was at H&M! And "polishing the diamond," that is what I'm trying to do. Oh yeah, and this lamb? Lamby is a gigantic stuffed chair thing that Heath likes to sit on. Random images I tell ya.

Time to start thinking about painting #6 of this series. The seasons are starting to change as we move towards the Equinox. I love this time of year, the shortening of the days, the slight change in the air and light quality. I'm thinking about maybe doing a portrait for the next painting. In my high school and early college days I was way into portraiture. I've also been looking at Japanese woodblock prints, Kokeshi dolls and bento box blogs. Swedish folk art and more tattoos...These go into the visual folder in my mind as I look around for inspiration.

Progress Report

2010-08-09T20:13:00.000-07:00

I've finally got painting #5 on my easel. This is a little sketch I did about a month ago, just doodling while Heath was playing his games on the computer. It percolated there for a while and kept percolating...I kept sketching...ideas kept floating into my head. Bits and pieces here and there. I'm noticing how these ideas come about, sometimes totally randomly. Polka dots, popsicles, diamonds, giant lambs...this is going to be one whimsical painting. I want to have fun with this painting. Somehow when I get to the canvas I think it's got to be good and solid, because I'm on canvas, not just on paper. Canvas is so formal. Paper is so informal. So it's got to be thought out. Right? Well, I'm gonna try to get out of my old little mold.

July was busy with the beach, the OC Fair, playdates, and watching whimsical Japanese animation films, like My Neighbor Totoro. Written and directed by Hayao Miyazaki. If you have never seen a Miyazaki film, you are missing out big time. They instantly calm "Hurricane Heath" down! And not in a zone-out, comatose kind of kid vid way. They are magical realms within everyday life. Slow moving scenes that really pull you in. So I guess the flatness of Japanese animation will probably influence this next painting.

Another artist/collaboration that I'm really into right now is Noferin. Good stuff here.

Muno-Zen

2010-06-28T13:50:00.000-07:00

Out of May comes this funny/serious painting of who else, but our lovable Muno from Yo Gabba Gabba doing zazen! (Only the best kid show in town!) What is my life these days? Kid vid and Zen meditation training...the humorous with the serious, the absurd with the ordinary, the dichotomy of all these things playing out in my life experience. Reminding myself to insert humor into my daily life...making sure to laugh and not take things so seriously. Not letting my thoughts rule my interior landscape. Really trying to not let them rule so much or make me suffer. So Muno doing zen is just the perfect visual candy for me! I wonder what his thoughts are like when he's observing them...

The branches above Muno's head are the coral tree in our front yard, whose blossoms appeared in May, but now have all but disappeared. May gray and a hazy sun. Isn't that what SoCal is all about when you live by the beach? At least in the morning, right?

Yesterday, I participated in my second zazenkai at ZCOC. A day full of awareness, attention, and a LOT of sitting. They are not to be missed. After about 4 hours of meditation, my mind finally gave up. It was great, just my breath going in an out and being purely aware.

Frustration and Redefining

2010-05-27T19:58:00.000-07:00

I spent 2 hours this morning working on painting #4 and managed to botch it up so badly that I needed to gesso over it this evening. What I wanted to be grey ended up turning this purply color and I it just dominated the painting. Crap! So I am feeling very frustrated. I've got to slow down before I jump right into a painting and think about my color palette more carefully. I'm learning a lot from this process and realizing I need to plan really well before starting a canvas.

I also feel like I need to redefine this goal of mine because I'm learning that this one painting per month is not very doable right now. With having a very active child who doesn't nap and having to take care of the household, my time is being gobbled up. Yes, he's in preschool for 2 mornings a week, but boy that time sure goes by fast. It's really just about 2 1/2 hours. Errands, taking care of myself, getting a bit of much needed exercise to keep the mood elevated (so I don't go crazy!), these are things that need to be attended to. I don't want to make excuses for myself, but I'm realizing what is really attainable within a one month span of time. Letting go, I need to do that. Letting go of expectations and this self critical nature. Man, I'm so hard on myself! I can't be like this!

So maybe at the end of the year, I finish four paintings or maybe 6 and that needs to be good enough. Who knows. Creativity can't be rushed. This whole project is a sort of experiment for me too...seeing what enfolds over time, seeing what I really want to express in my work. And I can imagine what my Zen teacher would say and that would probably be to give myself spaciousness.

Since I can't show you a new painting, I will show you a doll that I made a little girl for her 3rd birthday...

Painting #3: "Spring IS the flowers"

2010-05-16T21:34:00.000-07:00

Spring...the gorgeous bright yellow feeling of Spring with my son running around naked outside with glee. In March, the poppies starting blooming in our garden, lots of them, and I wanted to capture all their orangey-goodness, this thing called Spring happening outside and in our lives. I started this painting with a field of yellow and then it just sat there for a long time on the easel. I kept thinking and pondering how I was going to express these poppies and the intensity of their color. And finally when it hit me how I should approach the matter, I did it quickly, like the Impressionists would have. Approaching painting in a painterly way, not as a drawing on canvas.

In Zen, we talk about the Spring being the flowers. The flowers ARE the lengthening of the days, the longer sunlight. The flowers ARE the direct expression of the longer hours of light. Just like the falling leaves are the direct expression of the shorter days of fall. I love to watch how the poppies react to the sun. Closed up at night, gradually opening as the sun comes out, totally open and facing the sun during the day, then closing up again when the sun goes down...It's beautiful, the intelligence of nature. And just like these flowers, we naturally want to turn towards the sun as well.

April was a challenging month to paint in...I call it Birthday season because we celebrate 3 birthdays in one month. It was just really busy with Easter and family celebrations and then of course all the normal household/child management! And periods of Heath challenging authority. But then I got an Ott light last week which I think is going to help immensely. They are natural light lamps for artists/crafters and it is so great to paint at night (when I have the energy that is!). The light is just like daylight, it's brilliant!

The Awareness of Birds

2010-04-08T22:03:00.000-07:00

February's painting...
"The Awareness of Birds"
Acrylic on Canvas
20x24

I'm sorta a month behind in the painting process because of how the project unfolded. I painted January's painting in February and February's painting in March...March's painting will be painted in April and so on. Or I may decide that's not working and just focus on whatever's happening in the moment when I sit down to paint. We'll see how this progresses! One things for sure, I'll be painting next week when Heath goes back to his normal preschool routine...that darn Spring Break!

12 paintings in 1 year

2010-03-29T21:33:00.000-07:00

I return to the blogosphere! What a long lull in blogging, but I have a new project that I undertook and want to share here. As you may or may not know, my first love is art. (Knitting comes in a close second!) I love looking at art, making art, and since having my son Heath, creating became a very important outlet. Since Heath was born I've been doing some painting here and there, admist knitting projects and making needlefelted gnomes on Etsy. Mostly small paintings or paintings for his room, but never got the inspiration for a series of paintings or felt that I was trying too hard to make something happen. But wait, that's not true because I did have some good ideas but somehow it never got off the ground, with being sleep deprived and all....you know the story. Good intentions right? So fast forward till about 3 months ago…inspiration struck! Largely due to my Zen practice (that I started in June 2009), it occurred to me that my creativity and artistic process should happen organically. It need not to be forced. As my awareness started to blossom, so did the things I started noticing around me…the moth at the bottom of my grocery bag still perfectly intact, the pattern of raindrops on the pavement, the veins on the leaves of the swiss chard I was about to chop, the pattern the foam makes on the waves retreating out to sea at the beach…these were visual inspirations, moments of everyday awareness that were like signposts leading the way. So my creative process started to enfold. I must also say this is when Heath started preschool two days a week. Way back when, I told myself that when he was in school, I would take time for my creative pursuits. So here I am, with some time for myself and I am managing to carve away some time.

Now here’s the kicker…with my inspiration still fresh I gave myself a goal. Twelve paintings in one year. One per month. My artistic goal for 2010. They will be based on each month’s awareness…what I am seeing, noticing and perceiving. Simple, quiet paintings.

I hope I haven’t given myself too lofty of a goal, but I think I can stick with this. I’ll be posting these paintings here so please come back and visit me each month! I just completed the first 2 paintings, here is the first one for January.

Knitted Brobee

2009-07-27T16:51:00.001-07:00

For all the "Yo Gabba Gabba" fans out there...a knitted Brobee!! If you are in the dark about what "Yo Gabba Gabba" (YGG) is, it is just the best kids show out there! Packed with dancing, loveable creatures and catchy tunes sung by today's hippest and hottest bands, it is one of Heath's favorites and ours too. I'm always plugging it wherever I go and see parents w/young children. One of the creatures is Brobee, a monster of course, with super long arms and sings "There's a party in my tummy." My friend Jenny has a son named Will who also likes this show. He just turned 2 and I just had to make him one. I heavily modified an existing pattern, and needlefelted the facial features. I used acrylic yarn, but stuffed the front of his face w/wool batting so that I could needlefelt and it would stick. (Cause you can't needlefelt acrylic!) He's just adorable, don't you think so? And if you are curious about YGG, go here.

A Spring skirt and Viking Dream Sweater

2009-04-17T14:46:00.001-07:00

I've been finishing numerous projects around here in a frenzy of sewing and knitting. I got the bug to do a little sewing, so I made the skirt from the book "Sew U" by Wendy Mullin. Here it is in this lovely lotus flower fabric from Amy Butler. Don't ya just love her fabrics? The skirt fits wonderfully and even has a lining. Oooh, aaah. Simple a-line design. Lovely. Whenever I start a sewing project I think, this won't take too long and you know what? It takes a long time people to sew a garment, a bag or whatever. This is why I like knitting. Give me a ball of yarn and 2 needles and I'll make something. I'm much more into the process when it comes to knitting and with sewing, I'm always asking myself, when will I be finished?!!!

I'm calling the sweater my "Viking Coin Horde" sweater because all the buttons are a Viking's dream! All pewter, kinda heavy, but so lovely. Each is different. After finishing the sweater, it was way too short for my liking, so out came the scissors. I cut, cut, cut about an inch off and then carefully weaved the loops into my needles and knit down for about 4 inches. It worked just fine. There is a great scalloped button band too. This sweater was a straightforward knit, but the finishing was a killer! But I love it. I made it with my own two hands and will wear it forever and ever.

I also just finished the Amy Butler Birdie Sling bag and will post a picture next time!

Flying away...there went January

2009-02-08T22:08:00.001-08:00

Where did January go? In a flurry of new toddler classes (music and playball), trips to Disneyland with Papa, joining a MOMS group, and being sick, that's where! If you haven't been hit with this nasty cold virus that's going around, be very glad. It seems I've been sick most of January and now into February. It's just not fair! But in between, I've been doing a little creating...like this painting of geese. I really like the look of silhouettes right now and a bit of unfinished canvas too. It's all about that negative space. It now hangs above my computer.

I hope I can blog more in February than I did in January, which was nothing at all! Sometimes I have lots of ideas for blog posts and then I just get so tired at the end of the day, that when get a few moments to myself, I knit and watch my favorite shows on tv. Oh yeah, I'm working on a cardigan for myself from Knit 1 magazine. It's the Flower Cardi that's featured on the cover of the Spring/Summer 08 issue. I'm making it in Manos Del Uruguay, black, which is part merino, part corriedale. A lovely texture, part soft, part scratchy. I am a sucker for cardigans and this one was nice and simple with some nice details. But I'm not doing the flower part!! No, no, no, way too much for my taste. I'm knitting it on size 7 needles, so I'm almost done with most of the knitting. Just have one sleeve to go and it's on to the finishing. Yipppee! A new cardi in no time at all!

Happy Solstice, Merry Yule!

2008-12-22T21:19:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was the Winter Solstice, the first day of Winter and the shortest day of the year. A time to reflect on the year, to draw near to friends and family and light the Yule log. I've been spending a lot of time reflecting on what was a very busy 2008 for our family. Transitions were made, oaths fulfilled and lots of growing was done (by Heath!). And personal growth as well for myself...now I'm thinking about 2009 and what I want to see happen in this coming year. Tackling anxiety, living more and more in the present, really savoring these precious moments that I have with my 2 year old...and knit a sweater or two.

Here is wishing your 12 days of Yule are merry and bright! Wassail!

Norwegian Sweater finished!

2008-12-15T15:04:00.000-08:00

I have been lax in sharing photos of John's completed Norwegian sweater, so here he is in all it's glory!! I steeked the front opening as well, picked up stitches for a placket and knit a double thick collar. I think it looks so great on him, fits him wonderfully. I feel a big sense of accomplishment with this sweater! When I was finishing the knitting, I felt almost sad that I was completing it, since it was like a best friend for the past year. Always to be picked up and lovingly knitted, a joy for me to knit. But there will be more!!

Adventures in Steeking

2008-11-23T15:21:00.000-08:00

I steeked, I steeked!!! The sweater that I've been knitting this past year, John's Norwegian sweater, just got steeked the other night. Not for the faint of heart people! It felt so counterintuitive to knitting. Cut? Cut my knitting? You're not supposed to cut your knitting people! But that is what people in the old country did, so I had to as well. A little backstory about this sweater...I used "Knitting In the Old Way" by Priscilla A. Gibson-Roberts and "Traditional Scandinavian Knitting" to design this sweater, custom made to fit. The design motifs are very traditional Setesdal, Norway with a little Faroese thrown in on the sleeves. The yarn is Falk by Dale of Norway (superwash wool). This was a great sweater to knit...loved knitting in the round, no purling, just blissful knitting all the way. The torso portion is one big tube, with just some increases after the ribbing at the bottom. In mid October, I had finished the body part and gave myself a goal-to knit the sleeves and finish the sweater by Yule. And by golly, I finished those sleeves in one month!! Wow!

Then the fretting about the steeking for the armholes started. Was I going to ladder the sleeves or just stitch and slash? With the ladder method, you take 3 stitches at the bottom of the armhole and put them on waste yarn, then release those 3 sts at the top of the armhole and cut the floats, then tying the floats off in pairs. Or method 2, machine stitch twice on either side of a center cut line and then cut down the middle to the bottom of the armhole. (Now this is Norwegian steeking, not Fair Isle, so don't get confused. ) This was based on the methods in the "Knitting in the Old Way" book. I could go on and on about steeking, but many have written about it, particularly Eunny Jang. So I opted for the stitch and slash, as that looked to be easier and quicker, although the book said it wasn't preferred next to laddering. In a class I took on steeking, the instructor said to leave the zipper foot up when sewing your reinforcements, but I quickly learned that was not good! If you steek, for goodness sake, put your zipper foot down! You need that extra pressure on your knitting. Sewing the lines around the armhole took some time, but the second one went much faster...and looked nicer too.

After dinner, I decided to cut the steeks open, yikes! It felt very strange to cut my knitting. My hubby was there for moral support and take pics. Then I went back to the sewing machine and zig zagged the frayed edges and did it doubly around the bottom of the armhole. It was at this point when I realized laddering the sleeve openings is superior, because with those platform sts at the bottom of the armhole, you know your knitting won't unravel. But I just zig zagged really good, so they aren't going nowhere!!

Now I'm going back with the sleeves and knitting a facing at the top, so that when I sew the sleeves to the body, I can fold over the facing and cover the cut edge. I also steeked for a neck opening, but haven't done the cutting yet...then I'll knit a placket and a collar to finish it off. I'll post more on that later!

My Baby Turns 2

2008-11-14T16:01:00.001-08:00

My Heath...such a big boy now! He turned 2 today. A day filled with balloons, new drums, a hockey set and many other new toys. We celebrated with the grandparents here at our house and he had such a good 'ol time. BBQ food from our nearby restaurant, The Beach Pit and a train cake that Grammy made. It's hard to believe it was just 2 years ago that he entered the world. He is talking so much now, picking up new words every day...and he grew 5 inches in one year!! Yes, ladies and gents, he is 37 inches tall! I have to brag here, his doctor said he was one of the most advanced two year olds she had seen in a long time. That made me feel real good! High five for mom and dad! He is such a joy. FIlls me with love each day and makes me feel more wondrous of the world.

This picture was taken at "The Happiest Place on Earth" just a week ago. I happen to love Disneyland and thought it was time to introduce Heath to the Magic Kingdom. I hadn't been to the park in probably 9 years. Lots of new things, like a newer Tomorrowland, California Adventure (yawn) and Downtown Disney. We bought annual passes and so far we've gone twice in the past week and 1/2. We'll just go in the morning (takes a mere 15 mins to get there) and come home right after lunch, just in time for his nap (and ours too by that point). I also thought that when John goes back to work in the new year (he teaches at a year round school), D-land will be a fun place for Heath and I to hang out at. I think there is a certain magical quality to the place. Call me crazy, but it brings a tear to my eye when I go down Main Street. And I worked there throughout my college years, in Eastside Merch, which means Fantasyland, Tomorrowland and Toontown shops. I loved getting dressed in costume every day. So I have a big soft spot for the place and I can happily say that I will be going quite often.

But what's even more funny, is that he doesn't know who Mickey and Minnie are yet! He knows Cinderella and Winnie the Pooh, but haven't watched any Mickey Mouse stuff on TV. He saw Winnie the Pooh over in Bear Country and immediately recognized him. "Hi Pooh!" he said, which brought a tear to my ear. Oh yes, I'll be a Disney Mom before you know it!

Pumpkin Patch with my Pumpkin

2008-10-28T22:25:00.000-07:00

This past Sunday we visited the Irvine Park Railroad and Pumpkin Patch to ride the train and pick up some giant pumpkins! The place was packed full of families taking the requisite "pumpkins and kids" pictures. It's a great place to go because of all the things you can do...ride a haywagon, ride a pony, ride the train, go in a bounce house, ride a toy tractor...you got the idea. Getting cute pictures of Heath can be hard to do since he's always on the go! But this one really captures him.

"Get your thumb outta your mouth" or..."The New Sweater"

2008-10-14T14:13:00.001-07:00

Ta da! Heath's new sweater is finally finished and he's modeling it for us, ala thumb sucking. "Get that thumb outta your mouth!," I kept saying. But every picture with him in it has him sucking his digit. Oh well. The pattern is from "Easy Baby Knits" from Family Circle and is called Cable Classic. Knit with a bulky Universal Yarn (wool and acrylic) that I got from Liscat in Long Beach. It was an easy knit with some easy single cables that you did without a cable needle-love that! As you can see, it is a bit big, but that's okay-he will grow into it!! I wanted it that way as a matter of fact, since he's growing like a weed!

Stitch 'N Witch

2008-10-08T14:46:00.001-07:00

Just in time for Halloween, it's the stitchin' witches!! They have their own "Stitch 'N Witch" group, just like our Stitch 'N Bitch group does! They say things like, "Hex, hex, I dropped a stitch!" and cast spells on people while knitting. Good spells that is!

Prints are available in my Etsy shop!

Name that Movie

2008-10-02T21:42:00.000-07:00

I have another painting planned for Heath's room. This is my sketch...It is based on some characters in a particular Disney movie he is currently obsessed with. Can you guess which movie this is from? The balloon obsession continues with my little guy!

The Knitting Deer

2008-09-24T14:48:00.000-07:00

Here she is, the newest creation in my series of knitting animals! Prints are available in my Etsy store!

Happy Equinox/Winter Finding!

2008-09-22T20:34:00.000-07:00

Today is the Autumnal Equinox or Winter Finding, as we Heathens call it. A day of equal day and equal night, it marks the beginning of the descent of the sun, as we move towards Winter Solstice and the darkest day of the year. In our ancestors agrarian times, Equinox was the last "hoorah" of the harvest season. For most of us now though, we celebrate symbolically. Today, I prepared our home by sweeping and cleaning the floors-a sort of energy cleansing. Decorating the hearths and tables with symbols of the fall season , cooking a hearty beef stew, a family blessing and lighting a candle to mark the day. I can feel a shift internally as the seasons change, getting myself, my spirit, ready for the darker time of the year. I was reflective today, and a bit out of sorts...yesterday I had a bit of a car accident. I backed into a parked car (who was not in a parking spot), after going to Golden Spoon and it left me a bit shaken. This car was parked alongside the curb of the parking lot and I didn't even see her car behind me until it was too late. Unfortunately, AAA sees me as 100% to blame, but they will take care of the costs. I only had some scrapes to my bumper, but this lady's rear door was dented in pretty good. So there was some ensuing drama...but alas, thank goodness for insurance! I was thinking that this accident was almost like the universe's way of balancing me out. Reaching equilibrium in a way. Equinox, equilibrium, it seems to make sense. But anyway, I learned my lesson.

May the blessings of the Fall season be with you and yours!

Rustic Apple and Fig Tart

2008-09-15T14:39:00.000-07:00

Fresh from the oven...a rustic apple and fig tart that I just made. Mmmm. I hope it tastes as good as it looks. I am anticipating the first day of fall, as Equinox comes soon on September 22. The apples are from our friend Richard's tree in Mt. Baldy. I just had to bake this tart to celebrate the changing of the seasons...can't you feel it in the air? The light is different, more diffused. An almost hazy quality about the light that marks fall. And daylight is almost equal to night. Ah fall, how I adore thee.

Back in the World of Etsy

2008-09-09T14:49:00.000-07:00

Okay knitsters, I've got a few items up in my Etsy shop! The Knitting Rabbit prints and notecards. Don't worry, if the cards get sold, they will be put up again for repeats, as well as the prints. I've had the bug to start selling on Etsy again and this is my little jumpstart. I've got some other drawings and paintings that I'll be adding in the weeks to come! Thanks for looking!

The Knitting Bunny

2008-09-05T13:12:00.000-07:00

I had a sketch of this knitting bunny laying around for awhile and decided to make it into a watercolor painting. Some of my friends from my knitting groups, Long Beach Stitch 'n Bitch, have been talking about their Cafe Press shops so I was thinking about using this image for notecards, etc. What do you think? Is she cute enough to sell??

Tree Mural

2008-08-22T22:27:00.001-07:00

For August, I gave myself a goal. To finally paint the tree mural in the master bedroom that I have been wanting to do forever! I even finished it before the 15th. Inspired by a piece of jewerly I own, the mural represents the tree of life. Wall decals seem to be quite trendy these days, so instead of buying a tree to put on my wall, I knew I could do one myself and do one that I wanted! We didn't want to hang anything above our heads either, not wanting something to crash down on our heads in the event of an earthquake. A mural seemed to be the perfect answer. As you can see, the bedroom is a great deep forest green color. My wish is for the bedroom to have a "foresty, folky" feel. It's sort of a mish-mash right now of furniture and styles, but eventually, it will be the way I want it. I may even paint some deer silhouettes in the same color as the tree. I just love deer!

If anyone sees this and says, "Gosh, I'd love a mural for my own place!," let me know as I do commissioned work. Thinking about this too for a future part time job once Heath is school age. Always thinkin' around here!

Tattoos are Cool

2008-08-11T20:19:00.000-07:00

The Knitting Fetus

2008-07-25T14:58:00.000-07:00

Behold, the amazing knitting fetus! We held a baby shower for Rhonda at our knitting group the other night and this was the card I made for her.

Of Nipples, Sand, Surgery and Elmo

2008-07-07T12:56:00.000-07:00

The beginning of July marks the end of a very busy June. At the beginning of June, we installed The Nipple Project and had quite a successful opening reception and show! It was packed the night of the opening, which was also the Santa Ana Art Walk. We were so excited to have this project seen to completion and see all the nipples displayed in their glory!

The next week after the opening, the family (including my in-laws) took a trip to Cayucos, which is right above Morro Bay and below Cambria. This sleepy beach town has a great beach and long pier, perfect for Heath's first experience at the beach. He just loved the sand and dumping bucketfuls all over himself. He traveled very well with hardly a complaint. That was surprising as I didn't know how he'd do on a long car ride. We visited the elephant seals too, but they were scary to him.

After the trip came a bbq for Father's Day at our house...then summer solstice bbq at our house...and then to the scary part...Heath's hernia surgery. Poor little guy had an inguinal hernia (groin area) and so that whole ordeal was majorly stressful and scary. But he did great, got through the surgery and they even fixed two hernias. He had one on the other side. Seeing your child go off to the operating room is so hard. And then seeing him attached to a bunch of machines afterwards-man, that was hard too. But he made it and was just so sleepy and groggy from all the anesthesia.

In order to keep him relatively quiet afterwards, we watched a lot of Sesame Street and now he is quite enamored with Elmo. "Elmo, Elmo, Elmo," he says. This past week was a bit tiring and draining and watching too much Elmo! And feeling like a guilty parent for letting my child watch too much tv. But we had to keep him quiet! Quieting a busy body toddler is no easy task! But now, we can go to the park and do normal toddler things so the tv watching is not so much. Although, if he had his way, he'd probably watch Sesame Street all day long! He is doing great and I am amazed by how fast little ones rebound from surgery.

I've been knitting Heath a sweater for the winter that is to come, so I'll post some pics in my next post. I am glad that all the stressors of June are now behind me and I can enjoy the next month free of worry!

Happy Summer Solstice!

2008-06-20T13:09:00.000-07:00

It is an important day today! It is Midsummer, or Summer Solstice. The longest day of the year. And probably the hottest one too! The sun reaches it's apex today and from now on, it slowly dies, each day growing slightly shorter and shorter...until we reach Equinox in September. The sun rages that it is dying, hot on our backs, burning our skin....the plants go dormant.

In Scandinavia, people gather around the Maypole, symbol of fertility and virility, to dance and sing. Bonfires are lit and jumped over. Women wear wreaths of flowers in their hair. The old nursery rhyme, "Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack jump over the candlestick," is a remnant from those old times. Tomorrow we will be celebrating Midsummer with a BBQ with our Viking friends. Burning a sunwheel, jumping over a candlestick and raising a horn to Balder, a son of Odin, who was the golden boy of Norse mythology. "He is best, and all praise him; he is so fair of feature, and so bright, that light shines from him." -Gylfaginning This is an important day for our people. Enjoy the Solstice and the bright light it brings!

Installation of The Nipple Project

2008-05-29T20:20:00.000-07:00

We are fast approaching our installation of The Nipple Project. This Sunday, we start installing over 200 nipples in all their creative glory...wow, this has been quite a ride! Three years in the making, and here we are, just days away from completion. It is both exhilarating and stressful! All the little details of getting a show together. Sewing nipples onto...well, I'm leaving that a secret (only my knitting buddies know about!) The boyfriend of my project's partner Dre, said this is like a thesis. If only I could be getting my MFA from all this work!! I am so honored that so many people have come together to celebrate creativity in the expression of the nipple. Who knew when I was an art student at UCLA over 10 years ago that one day I'd be having a big exhibit with something called The Nipple Project. I am so excited that we are having this show and bringing a community of women together. Wow, wow, wow!

Go here to find out more about The Nipple Project. The opening is Sat, June 7 from 6-10 pm at the OCCCA in Santa Ana!! A lot of my knitting friends from my group, Long Beach Stitch 'n Bitch are going to be there, so it will be a rockin' good time!

Hurray, it's my Birthday!

2008-05-16T21:09:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday, hurray! I am winding down from a good day today...I spent it doing all the things I like. John made me french toast for breakfast, we took a walk down by the Back Bay, played and danced with Heath, did some knitting, bought some books, saw my parents (who gave me a beautiful bouquet of white roses) and topped it off with a night of dining with my hubby at Blue Coral (sans bebe). Shrimp Scampi, wine, and molten chocolate cake for dessert. Yumo!! After dinner, we drove the car around the part of the Back Bay which is across from where we live and spotted a bunch of different birds, like an egret and a black-capped night heron. And then there was the waxing moon above us. All in the balmy warm heat that we are experiencing right now. It was so delightful. I am 33 years old and it just seems that life just gets better and better each year. I am so grateful for the abundance in my life, my friends and family. So here's to another great year ahead!

Bear with Balloons painting finished!

2008-04-27T20:42:00.001-07:00

I posted awhile ago that the Bear with Balloons painting was finished and here it is! This is a very sentimental painting for me because it shows Heath's love of balloons. This was one of his first words! He says it as much as he can now in any given day. If it's round, it's a balloon. In the painting, the balloons flying away are also some of his first words-bear, egg, onion. I have been really inspired by low-brow artists such as Mark Ryden and Marion Peck, so this is my attempt at the genre. It now hangs in Heath's room and he enthusiastically says "balloon" when he sees it!

Strawberry Pickin'

2008-04-13T14:08:00.000-07:00

Yesterday we went to Strawberry Farms in Irvine for some strawberry pickin'! This place called Tanaka Farms is great because they give you a tour of the farm and you get to sample the bounty of the harvest while on the tour! We got to eat carrots, celery, green onion, lettuce and then the final stop was to pick strawberries right off the vine. I had never done that and it was just the best. We could eat as many as we wanted and also fill a basket. It was really hot and sunny so the strawberries were warm and juicy. Heath enjoyed himself and although he is not yet a big strawberry lover, he enjoyed touching the strawberries and holding one in each hand. The farm also has a fantastic pumpkin patch in the Fall and also watermelon pickin' in the summer. A great family place or even if you are just a farm lover! We will definitely go back!

A Trio

2008-04-10T22:09:00.001-07:00

Along with knitting small projects, I've been working on small art projects. I'm loving the small right now. I can do a little something while Heath is sleeping and can finish something relatively quickly and with enjoyment. I had these old frames from my husband's grandmother, so I made some drawings for my studio. I'm really into birds right now, as I've been spotting herons, egrets and geese on my Back Bay walks, so I did a pen drawing of flying geese. The drawing next to that is a deer mama character that I am particularly fond of with her little baby fawn. This will be a painting someday...And the bunny painting is on fabric over a wood box. Inspired by an article in a Martha Stewart magazine, I just had to make one myself! And I am loving the rabbit silhouette for Spring. Soon to come...the finished painting of Mama Bear and Baby Bear with balloons!

Ball Band Washcloth and...Egg

2008-04-03T13:04:00.001-07:00

Ta da, my Mason Dixon Ball Band washcloth is done! As well as this knitting egg. Hurray! The yarn store that my knitting group knits at, Liscat, gave me this pattern right before Ostara. After the holiday, I thought, wouldn't it be cute to make a nest of knitted eggs as decoration? Well, this egg turned out really big, not like your normal large size eggs you buy at the market. I need to go down in needle size. The washcloth was lots of fun. I love how it looks like bricks and morter. It knits up so nice and neat. An easy peasy knitting project that gives back! Love it! Gonna make some more to have for presents. I have been working on a Norwegian sweater that I'm designing for my husband and have completed half of the torso. It's knit in the round. But now I have to design the complicated top half of the sweater in fair isle on graph paper. Yippee! I need some quiet, concentrated time to do this. So his sweater is resting right now in the knitting bag, just waiting to be knit again. How I love knitting, it is just the best thing in the world.

Happy Ostara!

2008-03-20T19:23:00.000-07:00

It is a glorious day! It's the first day of Spring (Spring Equinox) and otherwise known as Ostara to us Scandinavian Earth religion types. Ostara is a Goddess of fertility who is celebrated on this seasonal festival. She was known by the Saxons as Eostre, the Goddess of Spring, from whom we have derived the word Easter. Ostara's symbols are the hare and the egg. There is equal day and equal night today. From now until Midsummer (June 21), the days will get longer and longer. I cooked a special meal tonight to honor the region we live in, near and by the Back Bay where the mustard is growing like crazy. So the meal was braised chicken with shallots and featured...mustard! Later on, we will go down to the Back Bay to welcome Spring and pour our libation to the land spirits. We honor the rebirth of the land, ourselves and our spirit. Hail Ostara!

Heath and the Easter Bunny...Then and Now

2008-03-14T13:27:00.000-07:00

Heath, Grandma Sue, and I were at Fashion Island yesterday and we just had to see the Easter Bunny. Last year, Heath was only 4 months old and he didn't mind sitting on the bunny's lap. This year, we weren't sure what he'd think, but he loved her! (It was a girl in the bunny suit.) He even screeched (as is his custom these days) at the bunny to say, "Hey, I like you!" So I have for you, the picture taken 1 year ago and the only taken yesterday to see how he's grown! I just realized that he is 16 months old today. Wow, look how big he is!!

5 Things About Me

2008-03-11T17:32:00.000-07:00

I have been tagged by fellow blogger, mom, and artist, Wendy over at Pregostar to write 5 facts about myself. Here are the rules to the game:Link to your tagger and post these rules. Share 5 facts about yourself. Tag 5 people at the end of your post and list their names (linking to them).Let them know they've been tagged by leaving a comment at their blogs.

1. "I knit, therefore I am." My mom-in-law Candy, taught me how to knit about 5 years ago and ever since I picked up the needles, I haven't stopped. It felt so natural to me, like it was passed down to me through the family blood line. I love knitting sweaters and things that challenge me to learn new techniques. I love knitting so much that I started a Stitch 'n Bitch group in Long Beach and we meet every Wednesday night. I rarely miss a meeting, unless I'm sick. It is the best group of women to be around and share the love of knitting!! As my friend Sandra puts it, they are my tribe. I love them all dearly. John (my hubby) likes to often say that knitting changed my life. It is so true. Now if only I had more time to knit!

2. I am an artist. I highly value creativity and since becoming a mom, for some reason, creating has become even more important to me. Right now, I'm focusing on small paintings and drawings, since my time is limited. Currently I'm really into drawing animals that I feel a kinship towards and drawing animal characters inspired by my interactions with my toddler.

3. I love being out in nature. We live by the Back Bay in Newport Beach and I've taken to go for long walks by the bay, spotting egrets, herons, kites (the bird variety), and all the native plants of the area. It is such an invigorating place to be and it really renews my spirit. Close to my love of nature, is my love for deer!! Don't have deer around here, but when I go to the mountains, I love spotting deer.

4. I am a mom. To my most adorable son Heath who is currently almost 16 months old. I am a full time mom as well which I wouldn't trade for any other job in the world! I admit, being a stay-at-home mom is not easy, but I'd sure rather spend my day with my toddler than have to go to work. Oh yeah, I also gave birth naturally, without meds which I'm really proud of! Motherhood is teaching me a lot about myself and making me a lot more present.

5. I have a very visible tattoo...and I want more. In a previous post in Dec 2007, I wrote about my new Julbock tattoo, which I absolutely love. It's on my upper arm, so whether I'm wearing a t-shirt or a tank top, it is there for everyone to see and I like that. There was something about getting the tattoo that brought me into myself, made me feel very alive and in the present. I'm thinking about what the next tattoo will be!

Okay, I'm going to tag some of my blogging friends now!
Skylar
Sandra
Vickery
Mary
Erin

"Let's be Friends"

2008-03-04T20:01:00.001-08:00

Spring is almost here, which makes me think of bunnies, eggs, the sun and flowers. So I've been doing some creating and thinking about cute animal characters, and out popped this sketch.

I'm Famous!

2008-02-19T13:25:00.001-08:00

I am in the OC Register today! My friend and I are sooooo excited about the coverage about our project...The Nipple Project. If you are in my knitting group, then you know about this already, but my friend Dre and I have been working on this craft/art collaborative project for 2 years now that is our little feminist attempt at bringing the nipple into the light and bringing all sort of creative people together in our efforts. It really all started when I saw this Victoria's Secret ad for the IPEX bra that advertised, "Maximum Nipple Coverage." I just thought it was the funniest thing in the world! So that got Dre and I thinking about doing some sort of creative project together, and The Nipple Project was born. Check out our website for all the details about our project. We need more nipples for our project, so if you are an artsy/craftsy individual, you should contribute one!

Here is a link to the OC Register article online.

Mt. Baldy

2008-02-18T21:17:00.000-08:00

We were up in Mt. Baldy yesterday visiting with friends. We usually take a walk down by the creek. The stark beauty of February was all around us.

Happy Valentine's Day

2008-02-14T11:54:00.000-08:00

Have a sweet Valentine's Day everyone! This is the card that I made for my sweetheart. We love deer around here.

Mama Bear sketch

2008-02-04T21:59:00.000-08:00

I'm picking up my paintbrushes again. It feels so good to return to what has always been my first passion---art. So I have a painting in the works and it's based on this sketch. This is going to be the 2nd painting in a series that I have decided to work on. Below the sketch is the first painting,"Mama Bear and Baby." My plan is to do a whole series of paintings based upon this character. Surprise, surprise, they are about motherhood, but that's what my world is about right? There is rich material to be derived from these everyday experiences. So you'll be seeing more sketches as these ideas are developed. I try to paint in the morning when I'm freshest, during his first nap and if I don't have any domestic duties to do. At night, it's just too dark and I'm pooped from the day's adventures. I do my knittin' at night!

This sketch is about Heath's new words and fascination with balloons. He loves them intensely. The balloons that are floating away are some of this new words-bear, egg, onion. And Mama Bear is looking upon him lovingly. Ah, these fleeting moments. The painting will be hung in his room when finished, so he can always have a balloon with him.

Quitting the caffeine is helping me immensely. My mind is still and quiet. I have a more consistent level of energy during the day. I'm not crashing from the caffeine high of the morning and turning into an irritable wreck by early evening. Isn't it something how food and drink can affect your system, your energy and your spirit?

Ms. Marigold finished!

2008-01-29T09:56:00.001-08:00

At last, my new sweater vest is finished, Ms. Marigold. It was knit with Misti Alpaca in a lovely forest green color. I had purchased this yarn at Stitches West 2 years ago and as of now, have knit all the yarn I bought while at the convention! If you haven't been to Stitches West, it is well worth the price of admission just for the marketplace. Oh.my.goddess. It is such a yarn high. Crack for knitters. Seriously.

I digress...my vest is finished and I am very happy with it. The pattern is from Zephyr Style. At first you wonder, how is this thing constructed? I mean, when you start to read the pattern, it doesn't make sense, but as you knit it, it reveals itself. I skipped the ruffled sleeves since I don't crochet and didn't want to bother with it. So it is a rather straightforward sweater vest. I may do a bit of needlefelting to spice it up a bit.

On a personal note, I am giving up coffee. Every so often, I realize that coffee is like speed to me and decide to quit for quite awhile, like a year. I was getting more and more irritable and not feeling like myself. Add to that the rushing thoughts, the mounting anxiety...these things do not help me in my day to day life with a toddler, so I gave it up, just like that. Hello tea! If anyone has a favorite herbal tea that they would recommend, I'd love to hear! I am feeling soooo much better sans coffee. I feel like myself again. And that's always, "a good thing."

Signs of the Times

2008-01-24T21:32:00.000-08:00

My little toddler Heath just keeps astounding me. He's becoming a "big boy" way too fast! I remember wistfully when he was a wee babe in my arms, and now he is on the move constantly, no resting, hardly any cuddle time, just wants to play, play, play. Which is great of course, but I miss the days when all I needed to do was hold him in my arms and he'd be as happy as a clam. Now he wants to tear books off the bookshelf and run around the house! Not quite running yet, but boy is he fast!

In just the past few days, he has started signing. Wow! Out of the blue it just started. I was making a sign for "bed," you know putting your hands together by your head like you are tired and sleepy...and he just clasped his hands together and moved them back and forth. Just like that! And then yesterday he started doing the sign for "more." Wow-ee! It blows my mind how quickly they learn. Like a connection in the brain that is made and then, wham, he's got it!

The all-knowing parenting books, we call them "They Say" books at our home, mention the caveman language of toddlers. They grunt and say, "eh, eh, eh," while gesturing for what they want. Our Heath is a little caveman too, but now when he wants to go to bed, he just reaches for the crib the moment I sit down to rock him. He just wants to go to bed now! Wah!!! I want to rock him! Have some cuddle time! John says he is showing me what a big boy he can be. But I miss rocking him. So I still sing him a little lullaby and shower him with kisses. Ah, my big boy, you are the apple of my eye.

Cult of the Swedish Christmas Goat

2008-01-17T09:46:00.001-08:00

So my mother was over the other day checking my sore throat and sore ear (she used to be a nurse), and she asked how my tattoo was healing. I said "fine," and then she wondered if anyone asks what it is. I said, "Yes, they do." And then she kinda said something like, "like you're in some kinda cult." And I just brushed it off and didn't think much about it, but later, it started to get under my skin. (Ha, ha, like the ink!) I told John later and he said in his dry wit, "Yeah, you're in the Cult of the Swedish Christmas Goat!" And we both laughed. Now I'm not going to tell my mom it's an old pagan symbol, but a cult? Come on now! I like rather like, "Cult of the Swedish Christmas Goat," or would it be better as "Swedish Christmas Goat Cult?" I rather like the former.

So as the story goes, yesterday Heath and I were down at the Santa Ana Arts District and we wandered into Grand Central, Cal State Fullerton's Art Gallery and were talking to a nice blond girl in the store. She asked me about my tattoo, I told her it was a Julbock and about the meaning, and she said her parents put one out every Christmas! Was she Swedish? No, she was German, but she recognized it! As we were talking, I told her my mom thought I was in a cult, yeah, the Cult of the Swedish Christmas Goat and she said, "I'd be in that cult!" So maybe I've got to do some art or a myspace page about this cult. Hmmmm...

Well, check out this little girl, she's in it! I already have a taker! Come on now, do you want to be in the Cult of the Swedish Christmas Goat?

Sneaky Banana Bread

2008-01-16T10:27:00.000-08:00

I love to bake. I don't bake often, because if I do, it will just go in my mouth. And that's not good for the waistband. But yesterday was a baking day and I made something from "Deceptively Delicious," Jessica Seinfeld's well-designed recipe book. So I baked her banana bread that has hidden in it...cauliflower puree. Her book is filled with these recipes that have hidden vegetable purees, so that your kids will eat them. And it turned out really good! I can't taste the cauliflower, but my husband says he can. Men! But he likes cauliflower, so it's okay. And it passed the Heath test...he loved it, all the while humming "mmmmm" while gobbling it up. I think it will be gone by today.

Sweater Lust

2008-01-13T19:58:00.000-08:00

I am so in love with this sweater it's not even funny. Designed by the incredibly talented Eunny Jang who is the editor of Interweave Knits magazine, it is called Autumn Rose and the pattern can be found here. This is fair isle at it's best. But I wish it was knit in the round and then steeked, not knit in pieces. I like the colorway, but I'd be willing to take a stab at choosing a different color palette. I'm thinking that this sweater might be the next project for myself.

I am almost finished with my Ms. Marigold vest. I didn't realize that the ruffly sleeve cap is crochet, so I may just finish it off without the ruffle. I will post pictures when I get it done!

Work is the Play of Mothers

2008-01-09T14:32:00.000-08:00

This is is a quote from my mom-in-law. She's always kidding me about "working." Like, I shouldn't be resting when he's sleeping, I should be working! Ah, she is a funny lady. Today, Heath is taking a 2nd nap, thank the gods! The 2nd nap has been taking a disappearing act lately, but he came down with thrush again (hasn't had it since he was 6 months old, but he had it off and on for the first 6 months of his life), so I think the meds are making him sleepy. So now I've got to sterilize all his sippy cup caps every day for 2 weeks. Argh. And to top it off, I got a flat tire last week so I had to take care of that today too. It's just one thing after another this week! But I've managed to do some crafting. This is a raven stencil I created for Heath's onesies when he was a wee babe, and now I've snazzed up one of my t-shirts.

While we were in the studio yesterday, Heath got into a bag of yarn and he was just so tickled with himself. Future yarn addict in the making?

Cutting without Fear

2008-01-06T21:51:00.000-08:00

Do not adjust your computer screen. You see it right, this lady is CUTTING HER KNITTING!!!

This would normally send any knitter into panic mode, but today I took a class on steeking at the Alamitos Bay Yarn Company in Long Beach. Steeking is a technique used in Norwegian knitting in which the knitter cuts her knitting to create armholes, or make a cardigan, etc. My mom-in-law Candy could not take the class, so I hopped on the chance because I am currently knitting a modernized version of a Norwegian sweater for my husband which will require...steeking. What a funny word, huh? Norwegian knitting is typically knit in the round because of all the stranded color work. (I LOVE knitting in the round.) But then you have to CUT your knitting, but not after you machine stitch on either side of where you are cutting. Now I did not have the homework completed since it was last minute, but from what I could see, the ladies in the class were not too freaked out about the endeavor. Anyway, the class was taught by Therese Chenowyth from Dale of Norway. Note: it is pronounced, Da-leh, not Dale like the Chipmunk. HEL-LO, she has my dream job. She's a technical editor, so after the Norwegian pattern is translated into English, she then makes sure the pattern is readable to us. And she lives in Vermont. Need I say more? I learned a lot today and it was a little intense, but now I feel I can "cut without fear." And you know what is funny, I sat next to a cat obsessed lady who after proclaiming her Swedish ancestry couldn't even tell me what my tattoo was. Obviously she's really not that Swedish or she would immediately said to me, "What a cool looking Julbock." Duh.

Finished Objects 2007

2008-01-04T15:33:00.000-08:00

Inspired by my knitting pal Monique, I created a mosaic of my knitted and needlefelted objects from 2007. Okay, so there is one little painting in there too, and a WIP, but I needed an even number! This past year was our first year with Heath, so I didn't get a lot of knitting done, but I did find an obsession with needlefelting and even started my own etsy store. We also renovated a house in the summer and moved in the fall, so I think I accomplished a lot this year!

The first object is the sweater for Heath-a Debbie Bliss pattern out of Rowan's All Season's Cotton. My mom started it, but didn't get far and said I should finish it or he'll outgrow it. This is is 6 month photo. The bunny, which I call "Funny Bunny" is from a site I can't remember, but I'm sure it'll come to me. The small painting is called "Mama Bear" inspired by my little man and the ferociousness you feel to protect your kin. I loved knitting Green Gable, the mauve short sleeve top at the bottom and the wavy scarf looks fabu in Noro. The WIP is Ms. Marigold from Zephyr knits and knit in Misti Alpaca. The blue shrug is a pattern from a shop called Unwind in Burbank. All ribbing and very easy, I knit this after Heath was born. Oh, and it's knit out of Malabrigo-soooo yummy! The holly number is a felt pin with needlefelted berries. My gnomes (or nisse as I call them) will be reported on in a post to follow.

"Ba-oon"

2007-12-30T19:10:00.000-08:00

My boy is saying words...tonight he brought me to tears. We were reading "Goodnight Moon" and when he saw the balloon, he touched it and said "ba-oon" along w/me. Now, once before we were reading a book about colors and he was particularly fascinated by the purple balloon he saw and attempted to say balloon. But tonight he patted it on the page and said the word. If you know "Goodnight Moon," you may have realized that on some pages there is a red balloon and some there are not. He went so far as to find the pages that had the balloon, even the page where it's the nighttime scene and you can hardly see it. That's my boy. I cried.

Here's Heath with his new toy car on Christmas morning.

The Eve of the Big Party

2007-12-28T20:41:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow night we are hosting a really big Yule party...20 heathens will be feasting at our home to celebrate our most holy holiday...Yule. Yes, Yule is 12 nights long and won't be ending till New Year's. It is a sit down dinner complete with a ham, all the trimmings and ending with Swedish rice pudding. Whoever finds an almond in their rice pudding will get good luck in the new year. We'll be drinking wassail and mead, boasting and toasting and celebrating in true heathen style.

I am exhausted from all the parties we have thrown this season. 5 in all. Starting w/Heath's 1st birthday party on Nov. 14, followed by 10 at Thanksgiving, then 25 at my knitting holiday party, then Christmas (just 7) and now to top it off...20 people for a late Yule feast. Phew! It's all been great, but all the prepping, grocery shopping and cooking has been a lot...I am ready for the season to wind down. Pictures of our festivities to follow!

Christmas Traditions

2007-12-26T10:45:00.000-08:00

We celebrated Christmas at our house yesterday with both sets of parents coming over. We had a traditional Swedish dinner complete with ham, potatoes, cucumber salad, rodkaal (red cabbage), limpa bread and lingonberries. It was delicious. As we sat at our Swedish farmhouse table, with red candles burning, I felt a deep connection to my ancestors. This Yule has really been an important one for me. We have really felt the spirit of Yule here at our home.

As my tattoo heals, the level of meaning grows deeper too...as I get reflective about my ancestors, I also realize that my ancestors in Sweden must have made Julbocks too and I feel the stirring of my folk within my bones. It is at this time of year that we honor the disir, or female ancestors of our family. Hail the Disir!

A Julbock Tattoo

2007-12-22T14:04:00.000-08:00

I have wanted a tattoo for a long time. Over 10 years of wanting...but never committing to a design. Partly because I wanted my own design, afterall my training is in art. But last night my husband surprised me with an awesome Yule gift. He was very sneaky, my John was. For weeks, he kept saying we needed to go pick up my gift in L.A. That there were 2 on order and I had to choose one. I thought maybe it was a rug because we need a new one for our family room. When I asked if it was, he said yes! Then he went on to talk about finding a place in the Westside for dessert and I was going along w/his ruse. But then he said it wasn't a rug, how could we afford a new one? So I was kept guessing...until yesterday morning when I was in a bit of a weepy mood and he said do you want to know where we are going for dinner tonight? The San Pedro Brewing company he said. That's next to the tattoo shop! As my eyes lit up, he said there were two designs waiting for me (which his tattoo guy Alfredo worked up). One was a Julbock and the other a Dala Horse. I was so happy I cried. At last, I will have my Swedish tattoo. And it was a real release-finally doing this for myself, not caring what my parents think about it, having a symbol of my ancestry and folk traditions on my arm.

You are probably wondering what a Julbock is! Julbock translates to Yule-goat. It is a Swedish straw goat that is brought out at Yule and Christmas in Sweden, a very ancient folk tradition. Before even Viking times, the family would gather the last of the wheat sheaves after the fall harvest and fashion a goat out of them tied with red ribbons. It would be saved for Yule at which time it was burned as a sacrifice. In these heathen times, the Julbock symbolized one of Thor's goats. As time passed, a man would dress up as a goat, go house to house w/presents and if you were visited by the goat-man, it was a sign of good luck for the year. Thor's blessings were yours. In the 19th century, the Julbock was eventually usurped by something called a tomten, which is much like Santa Claus, but more like a house elf. Nowadays, the Julbock is placed near the Christmas tree to guard the presents.

Alfredo at SoCal Tattoo in San Pedro created my tattoo. He was pretty gentle, a very funny guy and the pain was tolerable. Took about 3 1/2 hours. After giving birth with NO pain meds, I knew I could handle anything. It feels like a hot scratch. Sometimes I hardly felt it and other times I made weird faces to deal with the pain. At times, it felt kinda good. Weird I know.

I am very happy with my new tat and it has rejuvenated me in a way that's hard to explain. But I feel like myself again, and that's always a good feeling.

Yule Heath

2007-12-20T19:42:00.000-08:00

This is Heath, all ready for Yule! Tomorrow is the official start of Yule and it's also the Winter Solstice. Yule is a winter festival associated with the winter solstice celebrated in northern Europe since ancient times. Yule traditions include decorating a tree, burning a Yule log, the hanging of mistletoe and holly, giving gifts, and general celebration and merriment. It's an important holiday around our house...honoring our ancestry, our traditions and welcoming the return of Sunna (the sun).

To Blog or not to blog

2007-12-20T14:14:00.001-08:00

This is my third attempt at trying to write a blog and I'm determined to do it this time! This blog will be about my art, knitting, needlefelting and at times, motherhood. I have a 13 month old son named Heath and in the spaces between mothering and taking care of the home, I try in earnest to be creative. It's hard when all you have are short snippets of time to eek out an idea, sketch a quick drawing or knit a few rows. But like the viking that I am, I persevere!